Grinding Affairs in Quantum Realm

This week, I have completed all my marking for the final exams and also the assignments. I misunderstood about the last day of submitting all the marks to the exam unit to be Monday (meaning before Tuesday 12 midnight). I was contacted that about the matter by phone, stating that the deadline is Monday but before 12 noon. Serves me right for procrastinating. In any case it was just the marks for Electrodynamics that I needed to upload and I did it in time. Yesterday, I was told that I need to send the exam scripts for marking moderation. I did that after finishing an online meeting that begins at 2.30pm. It was raining heavily at 4pm and I asked my eldest son to drive us (with my other half) to XMUM since my eyesight (and driving) is not so good. Reaching there, met Dr. Siti Khatijah and Dr. Zaidan at the office. After finishing some exam matters, we decide to have early dinner together (with my family) at The Grind in front of XMUM.

Still on the exams, just this morning we had the department's exam board meeting and I learned how things are done in XMUM. We still have another thing to do, which is the teaching portfolio that everyone has to do before the semester ends. Job not finished yet.

The meeting before the trip to XMUM was basically for a proposal paper 'subcommittee' for the event that we are planning ahead of the International Year of Quantum Science & Technology in 2025. I gave my views on the matter (particularly the socio-political background) and the need for an organization or institution to take ownership of the event (and not simply by group of individuals as was initially done). I'm not quite sure how my views are perceived by others but I have no hidden agenda behind the views and they are meant to help rather than hinder. We do have the proposed consortium/coalition MyQI, though as far as I know, this has yet to be endorsed by respective partner universities (and hence it is not really official). It is best taken up by MyQI perhaps in collaboration with some recognised body while waiting for its own official recognition. There will probably be voices of concern whether we are ready for this or not, but those in the area should champion the idea (of the event or the organization); I do not expect anyone else (from say materials science or photonics or philosophy of science) to champion it; we have to do this ourselves and one must show our own belief in its importance. MyQI was a good start but in a way we are rather late in comparison with our neighbours. Some weeks ago, a colleague send this picture below showing Malaysia's absence in the quantum scene.

Listed in the pic are Thailand and Philippines on their investment in quantum science & technology. Singapore is already at the forefront together with western countries. Even Indonesia has started off with their BRIN Research Center for Quantum Physics (see also this interview). You might find this odd that Malaysia is not already in the scene. My Singapore colleague actually told me that it is known to them that there were individual efforts scattered around the country making good progress in quantum S&T but these have not being brought into a national concerted effort. There were actually earlier efforts to apply for a big grant together with my colleague in IIUM and other friends but the application was not successful. In a defence of the proposal, an official even told straight to my face, the project was too ambitious and will not work. It is always the case that our decision-makers tend to have poor views on our capabilities and that outsiders appreciate better on what we have been trying to do. Another attempt was during my days with INSPEM, hoping to collaborate with a national body but then Covid came and poof goes the idea. Let us just hope that MyQI will have better success in putting up a national cooperation in this important area. Of course, I now consider myself now as an outsider (riding off into the sunset) but I will give my full support to such cooperation.

On personal side, my family has been busy with matters of the husband of my sister-in-law who is now warded in IJN. My other half and eldest son have already visited him there. I was not able to go because of the commitment with exam matters and meetings. They have run tests on him (again) and found that there are two blockages and the problematic valve which requires surgery. When this will be, has yet to be known.

May Allah grant him recovery and good health.

Varia: Undo Stereotyping

This is my second (physical) attempt of writing this post - mentally, been running several versions in my head, mainly about personal stories of battling stereotypes. Finally, I would keep the post simple and my preference has always been to look into the future rather than caught in the past.

Earlier this week, my sister-in-law and her husband dropped by at our house, on their way to Kuala Lumpur for an appointment with IJN (National Heart Institute). The husband earlier had complications due to heart infection but was later diagnosed with heart problems with one of the valves no longer functioning. He is due to be warded this weekend and may undergo some procedures on the following Monday. Here are some pictures.

That night itself, I was informed about an online meeting on a planned activity on quantum science & technology, which eventually prepares us for the International Year of Quantum Science & Technology in 2025. I did highlight the event in my FB post dated April 15, 2023. Not much excitement when I first posted this, perhaps it was a distant away. Later, I was told by my ex-student, that someone is planning for an event. So, the meeting was a follow-up to the idea. The proposal seems to be conjured at a group level but yet involving the general public. Some of us thought that it would have been better to get an established organization to (co-) organize the event so that it has a better public appeal. This probably have made the planned idea a bit bigger and the suggestion was made not to sideline the original proposer. It is usually harder to get an established organization to agree to help organize the event without having them involved at the very beginning. I had some experience of that with EQuaLS in the past and I was a bit naive then. We were soliciting support from an organization (in fact, two organizations, one of governmental organization and another from a national industry) for a more steady funding for EQuaLS. Below are letters of support from the late Prof. S. Twareque Ali and the late Prof. Paul Busch; we had five other support letters from well-known internationally reputed scientists in the area. Unfortunately, we were unsuccessful, perhaps due to the nature of the event is very much an academic one and it might have seemed that the request is coming from only a single institution.

Despite so, the present proposal of planned activity has (the potential of) greater public exposure that might be of interest to the established organization. Worse come to worst, we can always fall back to the group-level activity that would have less public appeal. In any case, I wish the organizer the best - I will provide whatever support I can.

On Wednesday this week, I had another final exam for the other subject I'm teaching (i.e. Electrodynamics 1) and the venue is at a bigger exam hall. So I was up early to make sure that I was 40 minutes earlier before the exam, as suggested by the admin. Well, I arrived rather too early before anyone was there.

To be frank, this subject was one that I was least comfortable with teaching the subject. It would have better for someone who has more engineering outlook to teach the subject. In any case, I learned quite a bit especially in understanding some aspects of materials interacting with electromagnetic waves. The subject itself is pretty much classical with lots of uses of vector calculus. While I understand that the students had much exposure to vectors before, I thought it would be useful for them to know index notation to help prove many general vector identities. I guess some did not like it and considered this elementary (why learn another tool when you have the ordinary tools that one had before). I did explain to one student that index notation is very much used in theoretical physics, particularly if one goes into more advance stuff say those found in relativity and particle physics. Perhaps thinking that what I have taught being too simple for the students, I went for more advanced stuff in the other subject I'm teaching (Mathematical Methods in Physics 1). This course begins with complex analysis and then the latter topics were special functions, integral transforms and partial differential equations, which are not quite covered by the text book I have adopted (from a list of suggested books). I thought I should find a book that continues with the complex analysis theme through the above mentioned topics mentioned. Two books that I find that do this are Harold Cohen's "Mathematics for Scientists & Engineers" and James P. Keener's "Principles of Applied Mathematics". Since the former is out of print and would be difficult for the students to find, I adopted the latter. Unfortunately, the book is targeted at graduate students and I had to unpack some of the topics in a way accessible to the undergraduates. Not sure if they find this useful but I did put in a lot of efforts to cover some of the useful topics. Part of this experimentation is to show that I had the mantle to cover such advanced topics (not to be stereotyped as one that can't teach advanced subjects). So, I don't know ....

Today, I went to fetch my youngest from Jasin. His class finishes at noon and thereafter we rushed back to Seremban to catch our Friday prayers. Fortunately Masjid Hussain began the Friday sermon slightly later and we were in time. We had a light lunch after Fridays at Belqis Restaurant.

Rajab 1445 Varia

We have entered Rajab 1445, reminding myself closer to the grave (time is running out). I would be 63 soon according to the Hijri calendar. The crisis in Middle East is still raging on after 100 days and still counting (dependent on how one counts). Earlier, I have told my own family to be aware of all major events happening in the world and not to be gullible with soothsayers, end-days-warmongers but yet be mindful, expecting to be surprised at any time. I still share posts about the crisis on social media particularly on humanitarian issues, feeling that is the least I could do.

I still have mixed feelings about social media. Many times I tried to stay away from it but deep down, I thought that I may miss out something. Just yesterday, I saw this paper on Isaac Newton and learned that Newton had an opinion of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) is a prophet of God (see end of pg. 388), in a correspondence to Roger Cotes. Does it add anything to my faith? No, but I understand better who Newton is. 

When people post some opinion pieces on social media, sometimes I have the urge to post my take on it and many times I successfully resisted it (I really hated be in debate where disagreeing followers who are ready to pounce on us. There are times where I failed, of course. I see social media as a double-edged sword; while everyone can express their opinions (almost), due to selective algorithms, users tend to be in their own bubbles where stereotypes get more ingrained, especially those referring to Malaysia. As I have said many times, a major part of my life has been fighting stereotypes and hence the earlier mentioned urge - mainly to balance out the views. 

As a person with some experience (not much of course) in management and administrative matters, issues that have often been raised are discussed in meetings (sometimes fiercely). So, the picture of decision-makers are like zombies, following multiple bosses, are misleading; opinions are raised within closed circles, competing against a variety of (opposite) views. In the end, there will be only one decision and if one is lucky, it will side with the one that one favours. Otherwise consider oneself unlucky. I remembered an incident that I have to message a top management member to be fair in taking (balanced) views. For this, I was then invited to attend the senate meetings thereafter and note that the senate members are full professors of which I am not.

So in one post in social media, I decided to give my opinion on the issue just to say that the issue raised is not particularly unique to Malaysian academia but exists elsewhere as well. I do however express there are particular more basic issues that may have been unique to Malaysia given its historical development but also stated that I tend to be more forgiving these days. It was later that night (after commenting) that I had a nightmare, the type that I always had when I was in management - being ridiculed or sidelined or ignored. That comment I've made, triggered something in my subconscious. I fully understand that I felt I was not doing enough during my management days and perhaps underwent some form of imposter syndrome then. Thereafter, I posted something on the rarity of imposter syndrome in faith-based matters (unlike in science) and I don't just mean religion but even in our social outlook where faith or values play a role in the way we reason. The post is also meant that the degree of intellectual humility that we often impose in science becomes less when it comes to faith-based matters. In any case, back to my management days; I had one colleague down south making the remark that my circle or network of friends are not far enough or influential. This is indeed true since I am more of an introvert; I don't mingle too much after meetings to create a better circle of influence - it is just not me. So when I was interviewed for the XMUM (part-time) job, they asked me whether I want to do management and my reply was that I prefer to focus on science (where things are little clearer).

As far as my current job, it should end by January 31. I have no idea whether I will continue teaching in XMUM. Last week, I had one final exam done for one subject (Math Methods in Physics 1) and have just submitted the marks this morning.

Next week, I will have another one final exam on Electrodynamics 1 (which will be held in a bigger hall and I need to go very early for this). Here are the pics after my final lecture on Electrodynamics.

I hope all of my students will do well in their exams.

Back to College on New Year's Day

Welcome 2024. Found out from Ed Pegg Jr. of Wolfram Research that is a tetrahedral number (never knew about it before) and it is the 22nd (nonzero) number. I posted it up on FB, once I learned about it from this post in Wolfram Community. It is simply just a fun fact (no numerology meanings). I thought it is good to highlight that there are just so many interesting things about numbers (see for instance, https://oeis.org/) and many more, if one just have the knack for it.

One of the things that we did in this 'new year' was getting a group photo before my youngest son go back to college. All of my sons came back sometime in the weekend and I considered this a rarity. We try to make it joyous wherever possible (this requires efforts this day with me not being super healthy). So here are the photos.

Right after the photo shoot, we headed off to Melaka and stopped over in city of Melaka to have lunch and some shopping.

I posted this pic up in FB too despite the thought it may be considered insensitive when somewhere people are being terrorized. The reason being just letting others know that we had something to do that day (sending Izzuddin off to college). There was supposed to be a meeting on that day on organizing some quantum event for Southeast Asia and some asked me to attend it (with Thailand and Singaporean counterparts). In any case, I know little about the matter and it is better to have some younger people to take charge and let them shine. Also, I was getting comfortable of being less involved in things (as someone cheekily said that it is time for 'us, seniors' to be forgotten and joined the RTM group - relax tunggu mati). On a serious note, I prefer to spend more time with the family, doing scientific things in my spare time and try to focus more for the next phase of life.

After that time in the mall, we all went down to Jasin to send off Izzuddin.

As we went home, there was this huge jam on the highway.

We got home at around 5.30pm in the evening.

61 and Goodbye 2023

About two weeks ago, I turned 61. It came at a time when I was still struggling in preparation of final examination of the subjects I'm teaching. So, it was not quite a joyous moment. Of course, the family made a little celebration where we had dinner at Belqis Restaurant, a local Arabic restaurant. It boasted of the chef was once a chef for the Sultan of Bahrain. 

As we went out of the restaurant, I saw they were also selling kunafa (take-away) that we have started to enjoy since our umrah trip. Perhaps at some other time, we will buy them when we have the cravings. The family has also bought me a cake and we had it two days later in the weekend.

In the past, I would have posted these pics on the social media. This time, I did not, given what is happening in the world and I had several times shied away from the social media. The social media began to evolve as a toxic place to be and I wanted to stay away from being a participant in the toxic activities. In many ways, I sincerely believe that the social media is not the place for any serious academic discussions despite as an educator, one would like to use this available platform to educate others and oneself (at times, I do discover some useful gems). Much of this is due to many are using the platform to boost their ego and create closed-minded followers. A lot of us (academics) have fall victim to this behaviour and I think it is time for us to stop the rot. As a seeker of knowledge, one should stop using knowledge to serve our ego/elite status but rather help others to reap benefits from one's possession of knowledge. It is clear that knowledge on its own does not guarantee one's God-consciousness or higher moral stance. It is also clear that the knowledge one has gained (by the Grace of God) is not purely the results of one's strive. Indeed, given the knowledge one possesses, that should have instilled better intellectual humility and not the other way round (and hence my despise for arrogance). The sad thing is the system we tend to set up for academia (rankings, promotion etc.), moves away from this. Here, one remembers this hadith on those who wish/ask for leadership.

On that note, one should state that it is precisely arrogance that led to the conflict in Filistin, the thought that one has more rights or entitlement than others, giving way to politics of dispossession; rights without accompanying responsibilities. Extending such arrogance led to current genocide, committing crimes against humanity with impunity. I do read comments/posts from those who support such atrocities but much of these are read with a sense of disbelief. I also saw many links to videos in support of the genocide to hasten the end times as if it is a good thing to look forward to. One comment that I've read from a 'respectable' intellectual, which I guessed it was in response to bombardment of hospitals, querying why are there so many hospitals in the small region of Ghazzah, perhaps implying luxury or undeserving for the (two million) population. What a disappointing comment. Even the small city that I'm living in, with only half a million population has so many hospitals, public and private. In any case, such arguments do not even justify the crime of bombing hospitals. Anyway, we are approaching 100 days of the 'war' (aggression) and the suffering of the people of Filistin is unimaginable. May Allah replace their suffering with better days ahead or/and with Jannah; for those who caused the suffering, may Allah bring them to their senses or be damned in the hereafter.

So, what are my plans ahead in the new year. As much that I want to rest, I still have to work and earn extra income to help support the family. I must say that I'm not sure that I will get reappointed. My inability to meet the deadlines for setting the final exams must have looked bad; I will leave this to the management if they still need me to teach at XMUM. In a way, the current appointment helped me get used to the hard work; teaching four hours in one day often left me exhausted and there are plenty of documentations to prepare. I felt bad not being able to meet the deadlines and certainly was stressed about it. In my thoughts, I would rather prepare properly the exam questions as needed, even though this may put me in a bad light. I do still want to be active scientifically and teaching thus far, help me brushed up on things that I have left for so long (and this is not as easy as it sounds). If things do not quite go my way, I will still try to be active at least for a few more years. I joked with my sons that may be I should start a (technical) podcast, though I remembered a well-respected local scholar said that he prefer not to be recorded and he is well-known more for his writings rather than his public appearance. I wonder what were his reasons. For me, as imperfect human, we do tend to make mistakes (and go uncorrected) when we do oral presentations. Another fear is that as we see in many regular podcasts, there is pressure to create content and the dynamics of intent becomes different from the original ones that had education in mind. In any case, I just want to be useful, recalling an advice by John Inkson as relayed by David Bradley in a comment in FB. May all of these be passed as good deeds for me in the hereafter.

Just to mention last Friday, I have completed my work on the final exams and went to XMUM academic office to send some documents there. Thereafter, we prayed Asr at the surau in the administrative block (there was heavy traffic going south) and then decided to have our early dinner at The Grind Coffee & Kitchen, right in front of XMUM.

Bidding farewell to 2023 and hope for better things in 2024.

Varia: 'Exam' in Progress

I have promised myself that I would not blog until I made significant progress with my preparation for the final exams of the two subjects I am teaching. Breaking partially this promise as I have one subject more to go. Pretty stressed up but as they say, only the person experiencing it knows the actual pain involved. Many things have gone past and I need to record them.

First, my involvement in PERFIK 2023. I was asked by the Program Chair to chair at least one session and I remembered this was asked even before I had officially joined XMUM as a part-time lecturer. I agreed to help but I did not know at the time, I was listed as a committee (and my role as advisor was only known to me after the event on checking the website - note my null affiliation).

It has been a while since I have joined any conference event. Perhaps the last one I attended was the one in India (see this post - actually I was unwell at the time). So one the day itself, I did my part though I must say on my mind, was the deadline for the final exam materials on the following Friday. The session I was chairing was on Astronomy and Theoretical Physics. 

Perhaps, some might say that chairing talks is an easy task but if one is really responsible is to note that (besides time-keeping) the heavy part is to encourage people to interact (ask questions). So if there are no questions from the audience, the chairperson might have to start the ball rolling. This requires one to be attentive to the contents of the talk. I asked a few questions myself in some of the talks and this was quite easy for me because I do want to learn something from the talks.

I still follow the genocide happening in Ghazza, Palestine. It has now reached almost 20,000 people killed and about two million people displaced. Simply madness. I have been listening to many podcasts and commentaries on this issue. Some include views of Refaat Alareer, reporting live from Ghazza. At the time I did not know that he was a UPM alumni (see news item here). After the pic below appeared, then I remembered about one piece of news of an academic staff being listed on the watchlist of the States denying the person's entry but the person contested the matter.

Some videos worth watching of Refaat are https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0RaHuEjqi0 and his poem "I Am You" here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZE7YnRIXtg. 

I do worry about our future if there is 'an end' to the present tragedy. There are news report that Ghazza has been used as testing ground for weapons. This includes an AI system called Habsora, to set up targets in Ghazza (certainly not the way AI should be used - somehow I was reminded of the film Minority Report). Some might wonder why I'm (still) posting on this issue. For me it is a significant event in our times and matters to me as a human and as a Muslim. If others do not want to highlight this matter, it is their choice and I have mine.

Other developments: Through Suhaimi Napis efforts, we got reconnected with Moha Lhousni, our colleague in University of Durham. I remembered having his thesis (see below) and we had many discussions then.

Just recently, Moha send us this photo. I was told it was during 'Eid and I believe it is at Parsons Field House (our accommodation).

Nest, was my meet with Dr. Yap Yung Szen who was at XMUM to give a guest lecture in Prof. Paterek's class. We chatted a bit about work, admin and stuff. He showed me a single qubit and a 10-qubit chip that he brought along for his lecture there.

Finally, some time last week, Dr. Nurisya told me that they have cleared my old office. I was hoping to do these myself but sometime earlier I was told to return the key to my old office. I hope there are no valuable stuff being thrown away. I did mention that I will donate some books (in Malay) andthesis to the theory group.

I have to thank them (Dr. Nurisya, Dr. Chan and the students) for this help.

Final Destination and Snake in the Backyard

Last week, I am reminded of our temporary place in this world, as my brother (and his sons) went around to visit and help tidy up the graves of our loved ones. He himself lost his other half just recently (last August). Here are pics of their graves.

My late father Zainuddin Udin (18 September 1924 - 2 November 1990)

My late mother, Habibah Daik (16 November 1928 - 13 July 2009)

My step mother, Zaharah Ibrahim (1 January 1935 - 26 August 1991)

My eldest brother, Aminuddin Zainuddin (17 November 1944 - 6 December 2021)

My second eldest brother, Zainal Abidin Zainuddin (16 June 1947 - 2 October 1997)

My third eldest brother, Ahmad Tajuddin Zainuddin (23 January 1950 - 16 May 2021)

His eldest son Nashruddin Ahmad Tajuddin passed away just slightly more than a month before (19 September 1978 - 30 March 2021).

This will be all our final destination in this world. Please let me die with a good ending in the pleasance of Allah s.w.t.

Last Saturday, we went to visit sister in law Aishah, wife of late Ahmad Tajuddin. Had brunch there. We were there nly with my eldest son as my other half went back to Segamat with my third son, to visit her sister whose husband was hospitalized for lung infections and heart problems. 

We also met Kak Aishah's elder sister there. Besides meeting them, I took the opportunity to salvage some books from my late brother's book collection before they are donated elsewhere. This is what I have got.

It seems that the second book was heavily used by my brother (plenty of bookmarks).

There were many more interesting books mainly on philosophy and management but I was already too shy to get that few (not sure when will I read it). With my eldest brother book collection, there would have been many more mathematics books, but unfortunately I did not have the opportunity to salvage any. May Allah forgive all of them and reward them with Jannah.

My other half's return to Segamat saw them (with my other two kids) having meals like below and picking up rambutans in the compound.

I didn't get to mention in my last post while my other half  was having a conference that our neighbour (a few houses away) saw a snake at their place.

The snake has been caught by Malaysian Civil Defence Department, shown in the video below).

We try to keep our backyard tidy (without too much vegetation) simply because of this reason.

I sincerely wish that my mind is as clear and tidy as this.