Knocking Opportunities and Responsibilities

One of the hadith (Prophetic tradition) that had some impact on me when I first read it is the following:

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "O `Abdur-Rahman! Do not seek to be a ruler, for if you are given authority on your demand then you will be held responsible for it, but if you are given it without asking (for it), then you will be helped (by Allah) in it. If you ever take an oath to do something and later on you find that something else is better, then you should expiate your oath and do what is better." (see here)

When I looked back upon the events of my life, I try to reframe in the context of the hadith. For instance, when I first took an administrative position, it was not me chasing for it. I was asked to form a new laboratory (Theoretical Studies Laboratory = TSL) at Institute for Advanced Technology (note that it has changed its name but in those days, it had the acronym ITMA), it was really the idea of Prof. M.A.K. Lodhi to the management and I was invited to head it. I did not immediately said yes and sat on the brewing idea until the Director urged me not to delay the decision. Much of the delay is really due to the preparation of its paperwork. Even later when there were restructuring of institutes for which I was told that TSL is to merge with the mathematics institute (INSPEM), I consulted the INSPEM director about the idea and how to go about it (not pushing it). Initially, I joined the mathematics institute as an ordinary member but later I was asked to head Laboratory of Computational Sciences and Informatics. Given the field of the lab, much of me was figuring out how to fit in. After awhile, I saw that the research conducted by the lab can be lumped mostly into Computational Sciences, while Informatics was not quite the emphasis. That is when I proposed the change of name to Computational Sciences and Mathematical Physics. At the time, my students and I were doing research on cusp forms on hyperbolic surfaces, which sits nicely between the domains of computational sciences and mathematical physics. Later, I wanted to push for complex networks which sits between computationl sciences, networked systems and computable structures, but perhaps it was not as successful as I had wished. After awhile, another opportunity came kncking, namely the appointment as Deputy Director and this was also not from my push but I accepted it then (not knowing what it will bring). Citing health problems, I later stepped down and I was back at the Department/Faculty as an ordinary member and had preferred it that way until my retirement.

The prophetic tradition stated above also influenced my decision making in other matters. I rarely push for anything unless opportunities come knocking my way. While I have ambitions,needs and wants like any other ordinary person, I tend not to push myself for them until opportunities come naturally. Even in mundane matters like adopting cats, most of the cats we owned was given to us or crossed out path in some way e.g. the three legged cat Hitam who came to us for help (see this post).

Presently, my son Ihsan presented to us the opportunity of owning another further three cats that his friend wanted to let go due to his job in Singapore and has little time to look after them. We are still thinking about it since we already have eight cats in our house. There are responsibilities that come with owning cats and so far, the maximum number of cats that we had was twelve.

Eid-ul-Adha 1447

We celebrated Eid-ul-Adha today. It is recommended that we do not have breakfast first before the 'Eid prayers and be early at the mosque particularly at our place. Izhar drove us (me and Izzuddin; our eldest was down with flu and was advised to rest) to Masjid Hussain at 7.35 am. We can see many people (mostly immigrant workers, I think) already walking towards the mosque. While we were quite early, the main prayer hall was already filling up quickly and 15 minutes later, it was packed.

The 'Eid prayers started at around 8.25 am after the Imam reminded us how to perform the prayers since it is only done twice a year (the other one is during Eid-ul Fitri). After the prayers, the 'Eid sermon was given and thereafter we went home to have our  breakfast.

We took a group photo after breakfast. Not included the picture is Izhar who took the photo and Ihsan who had to work during 'Eid this time.

We did not go anywhere today and simply stayed home. We were also waiting for our autogate repairman to come as the gate wheels were not functioning properly.

The repair caused me RM250 (which includes the cost of a pair of new wheels) and I guess the price is fitting since today is a public holiday. I hope that there will be no unexpected expenses after this.

Note added: It is a bit worrying that there are now plans for a mischievious administrative takeover of Al-Aqsa mosque. It will sure caused an uproar in the Muslim world. You can listen about the plans here.

Fasting on Day of Tarwiyah and Day of Arafah

As a Muslim, I have fasted on the Day of Tarwiyah and in an hour, I will be breaking fast for the Day of Arafah. May Allah make me a better Muslim. even if there is a significant hatred towards Muslims today. It is recommended that we make supplications during this day.  One can watch the live telecast of this day below:

or the one below: 

 

May Allah give me the opportunity to do pilgirmage. May Allah protect us in these trying times.

The news that I have just heard is that war on Iran has just restarted despite the proclaimed negotiations and peace talks. May common sense prevailed and the Fasadists be prevented from causing more destruction.

Note added: This afternoon, I have just watched Sneako interviewing Korra. I do not know who Korra is, maybe I should check her viralled debate video. Also I watched this video of Prof. Jiang's lecture; I was wondering what was the context of this lecture being given. Do watch minute 16:46 that led me to chuckle a bit.

Saturn's Day Matters

Yesterday, me and my other half went down to UiTM Jasin to pick up our youngest son for his mid-semester break that coincides with Eidul-Adha. Just the day before, Ihsan decided to come home for a short break from his work. So yesterday, we had the whole family together at least briefly.

When we picked up Izzuddin yesterday,we were told that all the eateries in campus were closed since Thursday due to the upcoming holidays. We could not pick him up earlier because he had a test on Friday. Also he had exhausted all his pocket money (without informing me) then, since food ordered from outside tend to be more expensive. So we decided to stop at the Ayer Keroh RnR for him to have his breakfast.

Sometime in the afternoon, my other half's sister stopped by with her daughter's family as she was on the way to PJ for a wedding. Some photos

In the evening, before ihsan goes back to work, we (except for Izhar) went out for dinner at the new mamak restaurant at Icon. Here's a gtoup photo outside the restaurant.

Thereafter Ihsan drove back to Johor as he will clocked in for work at 7am the next day. Hope we will be able to have another family gathering after Eidul Adha. Wishing for happier moments (and with hopefully, better economic conditions).

Dzulhijjah 1447 Varia

We are now in the month of Dzulhijjah, the month when Muslims perform the pilgrimage (I have yet to perform hajj, but had umrah experience back in 2023). Let me begin this post by saying that yesterday I had received the sad news that a school-mate of mine had passed away in Makkah. I have not seen him since I left school though my other friends were saying that I should meet him. Unfortunately, I did not have the good opportunity to see this blessed friend of mine. Here I am, still attached to this temporary worldly desires, and now envying him. May Allah grant me a good ending.

Yesterday, I was also visiting my sister-in-law who has been admitted to IJN (National Heart Institute). I wasn't feeling good myself and have not progressed in making the appointment with the university specialist before I could get an IJN appointment. Here are some photos:

Lately, I have tried to avoid doing social media posts since it has become a toxic place, a battleground of influencers. Doom scrolling through FB while waiting at IJN yesterday, I saw plenty of disgusting Islamophobic posts with outright lies. Luckily, I've brought some reading material and read it instead  It is Chris Fuchs selected email correspondences (see quant-ph/0105039). 

I took it out from the store, thinking that it would be easy reading. Instead it got me strayed, thinking about a lot of things. See for example below.

Anyway, this is the current state I am in: always distracted despite I was supposed to finish reviewing a book draft (which I can only do with the laptop - no more printing). Much of me now prefer to limit my screentime and read materials that I have printed before and once I'm done (with notes written down), I can recycle them away. At least that is what I fantasize. Got too many different  projects on now and time is running out. I hope to discipline myself enough before the new Hijri year sets in. May my prayers be granted.

Added note: Just saw this latest Sneako interview with Prof. Jiang and Malaysia has been mentioned several times. In some way, I am surprised with Jiang's obsession with the occult materials of the West though it is understood that he was trained in the States and that there is a widespread Western influence. I do hope he could start making some comparative studies with (occult?) materials from Asia and other cultures. In this way, this would allow possible predictions in the expected multi-polar world and be less Western oriented. By the way, just took out this book (see pic below) from my book shelf - predictve history? There is another book by the same author titled "The Reluctant Prophets" but it remained hidden within the book cabinet.

Studently Teacher

Yesterday and today, I received  Teacher's Day wishes from a school-mate and a student of my younger colleague. I consider myself more as a student than a teacher; even today, I still feel that I have much to learn. Due to this, I felt I have not done much as a teacher. I come from an average Malay family with no real preparation for me to begin a career in theoretical physics (to this, I actually envy those who had such preparations including the ones of Olympiads). It was only in my third and fourth years of my undergraduate studies in Adelaide that I got to know more about theoretical physics. So that besides those years and the Part III year in Cambridge, most of my knowledge in theoretical physics are from self-study. So when I come back from my PhD, I had this mission of making theoretical physics opportunities available to our local students. I even mentioned this in my interview for my lecturer position in UPM.

Trained as a theorist, I taught mostly theoretical subjects in the physics curriculum with extensive teaching in quantum mechanics. The pic below shows the class of Special Relativity & Classical Field Theory during my final years of teaching in UPM.

After many years of undergraduate teaching, I found myself 'stuck' thinking at the level of undergraduate (theoretical) physics. It was then, I conciously become aware of the need of reseearch-level thinking and I began to take many graduate students. Unfortunately there was no elaborate postgraduate-level courses for theoretical physics apart from Advanced Mathematical Physics (even this, it is more often reintroducing some of the undergraduate topics taught at a more technical level. Thus, my postgraduate 'teaching' is often limited to personal interactions and group meetings with my students, and had to depend upon the curiosity level of the students themselves. Due to my own experience as a postgraduate student, I tend to take student independence as part of the training. I was told by Dr. Toh, this might not be suitable for everyone and indeed some students did not quite finish their studies. In my final years of undergraduate teaching, I began to introduce independent reading list from mostly journals, for students to do (critical) reviews as assignments. I wasn't sure what impact it has on students since this was only given in a few (final) semesters. I do hope it has instlled some interest of students in theoretical physics and perhaps the idea of independent self-study.

As I have said above, I consider myself more as a student than a teacher and I'm pretty sure there are many shortcomings in my teaching (May Allah forgive me). Studying theoretical physics is not easy and one has to work very hard. As an average Malay (student), I certainly had to overcome (cultural) inhibitions and inferiority complex. I remember vaguely my late mum was telling me the story of what she heard during her pilgrimage (I think) from someone academic who was in the same pilgrimage, saying that it was 'rare' for a Malay to take up theoretical physics. I certainly would like to push back such stereotype. Yes, it is hard work but it is not impossible. I would say, if me as an average student can do it, then others should be able to do so. I leave with some pictures of slides that I had prepared for a workshop for academic advisors early in my career.

Varia: Unexpected Valued Trivialities

Yesterday around mid-day (when it is usually the hottest),we had a two-hour blackout. I was not aware of any early notification of the blackout. At the time, I was working on my laptop; since I have been putting off purchasing battery for my laptop, just to make sure my pension pay is enough until the next pay, the work thus went unsaved. Blackouts are pretty rare here and the last time we had one was due to installation of electrical lines at the site of a soon-to-be constructed private hospital nearby (see the crane in the picture below taken from our balcony).

Speaking about blackouts, I was reminded about the almost weekly blackouts when I was in Bintulu yarns ago, since the electrical supply was unstable back then and it was also a newly developed campus. I was given a fellow apartment/room at the top floor in an empty hostel block for which I was supposed to be the residential fellow. So for a full semester, I had spent many nights there alone in the dark. Most of the time I preferred not to move around the block and stayed in the apartment with a single candlelight. The eerie feelings were there but no unwanted incidents happened (alhamdulillah). Some people were even mentioning then that I must be that brave to stay there alone. In another semester, my block had students in them and another block was empty. During that time, I had another fellow from the empty block came to temporarily stay with me as he got uncomfortable all alone in his block (what more if there is a blackout). Unfortunately the person gets bossy over in my place and I had very little privacy. After a while, he got on my nerves and I had to tell him off, thus asked him to move out. It was unpleasant for me to do so and I tend to 'justify' my action, thinking over it now, that even in Prophetic tradition our obligations to put up guests is for three days (see here). May Allah forgive if I was really unkind.

Another thing that happened yesterday was a crane parked along our road since the city council had decided to do some tree pruning. Again, there was no notification as far as I am aware. So the road was blocked and we had to delay our going out (for an outside appointment).

Perhaps some lessons of all the above trivialities (that I wish I can convey to my sons), there are always unexpected things that can happen in our lives. Our lives have always turned out not to be in the way we wanted. One just need to be patient in putting up with all of these. Find workarounds and tawakal ala Allah.