Unbreak My Art

Yesterday, I went back to open my FB account (unbreaking my break), much to the following news item regarding Mansour Shouman a voluntary ground-level reporter from Ghazza. I've been following him for a while. Then, just some days ago, one hears that he went missing and the photo might be a real possibility. There are conflicting reports though but in any case, I hope he is safe and sound or be safely returned.

As I have mentioned above, one should be highly critical of any news item that one receives nowadays and be aware of those who spread false news habitually. I remembered reading one post of a physics professor who said that the occupying state should invest more on information warfare as it seemed that they are losing this end. Indeed, it has come to this, that truth and justice does not really matter, but as they say in politics, it is more of the optics. It is disappointing to see such learned professor to have such (opposite) views.

This brings me to why I felt repulsive reading some recent social media posts and tried to rationalize why we do the things we do.

Why do we do social media posts

One often post things in social media to share things that occur in our life, share knowledge that we have gained. There are also other reasons that I see others do (I try to refrain from doing so): promoting business and political campaigning. Note: from time to time, I do try to promote some local businesses, helping others. The overall purpose seems to be more of therapeutic in nature, making one happy in the end. The question is whether it make others happy or more knowledgeable. Some, I see it is public shaming (rightfully or not) and worse, the readers are often "not real friends". Some would say, that rightful channel often leads to nowhere - well, that is part of our complex life, how far can one strive and do the delicate balancing act.

Be aware of own's biasness and stereotypings

Being humans, each one of us has one's own biases. This is fine, but one should have an acute awareness of this when dealing with differences of opinions. Time and again, one can see examples in real life when one's dislike of a person/community clouded one's judgment or decision, dismissing the possibility of the person/community being in the right, sometimes to the extent of causing acts of injustice. In sorting out differences, it may require a deep dive investigation, separating facts from fictions or opinions and sometimes this requires a (hopefully impartial) third party to resolve issues (and the third party is certainly not social media).

On this matter, I recall a tweet of a famous physicist doubting the view that people of different faiths generally have lived peacefully within Muslim societies in the past. One can check historical records of course and it is key to highlight the word 'generally' because there will always be exceptions and these would need a different deep dive (e.g. when conflicts occur). It can be always argued that Muslims have a biased view, giving a distilled clean history of the past. Thus, here sometimes I value (impartial) non-Muslim accounts of history (without distortions or opinionated narratives) to corroborate the said claims of peaceful co-existence. Of course, this might not be perfect (and I would be willing to listen to alternative resolutions of this problem).

To err is human, but to deceive is sinful

Humans can err in judgements/opinions as they are not omniscient. Despite this, humans have the potential to grow, to be knowledgeable and to be wise. Thus, humans must be perceived together with its dynamics. Stereotypes however tend to rob humans its dynamical character and to doom a person/community with its often-negative traits and these are often used as short-cuts for instant judgements. Given all these considerations, one could be more forgiving, emphatic and positive when treating others. 

Once one errs (with complete understanding and no room for contextualization), the normal thing to do is take corrective actions. If one still proceeds with the said error, then one is said to be deceiving others, which is morally wrong or sinful.

In this respect, I have seen scholars who might have erred in certain circumstances, but they are being vilified by sectors of a community, throwing away all the good things that they do. I don't subscribe to such actions. I may have disagreements on specific issues with the person but that does not take away my respect for the other good things that the person did. It is rather unfortunate that if some expect others to be completely perfect but yet we know our own selves are not.

Back to normal blogging: The above are my mere reflections on some issues raised in the social media but let me get back to events happening in my personal sphere. Today is my last day to complete my teaching portfolio and there are many things to be completed. Yesterday, I went back to XMUM campus to get some documents back for me to use in completing the teaching portfolio. There I met Assoc. Prof. Dr. Yap Seong Shan, who was my former FYP student in her BSc days. She has joined XMUM relatively recently (earlier than I did). We discussed over coffee on the curriculum there and the the one we had in UPM. The physics program is still new (three years) and the department is still expanding, I'm told.

After the brief meet, we went to search for the eatery introduced to us by Dr. Siti i.e. Warisan Sotong Giant. We had our lunch there and grabbed some food for our dinner later at home.

Meta-Break

Yesterday, I decided to take a break from one social media platform that I have frequently used. There are too many posts that depressed me, particularly those on local academia shaming. Are we (us in local academia) that hopeless? I am not trying to defend any academic wrongdoings or flaws here (note that they are not unique to our local environment as I have pointed out a few times), but I simply wish that there are more posts that paint the positive parts of local academia. Most disappointing are those posts that downgrade others only to make him or herself look better. They don't solve problems but worse, only reinforce stereotypes.

Not sure how long this break will be but I prefer to find things that inspire me or make myself better. Been looking into videos of reverts talking about their stories, videos of tourist vloggers describing the many good things that our country has (often glossed over by ourselves), videos on many facets of this complex life, and of course lectures that will help me prepare for my next life. Just like before, I hope to renew myself in the little window of time that I have left.

Grinding Affairs in Quantum Realm

This week, I have completed all my marking for the final exams and also the assignments. I misunderstood about the last day of submitting all the marks to the exam unit to be Monday (meaning before Tuesday 12 midnight). I was contacted that about the matter by phone, stating that the deadline is Monday but before 12 noon. Serves me right for procrastinating. In any case it was just the marks for Electrodynamics that I needed to upload and I did it in time. Yesterday, I was told that I need to send the exam scripts for marking moderation. I did that after finishing an online meeting that begins at 2.30pm. It was raining heavily at 4pm and I asked my eldest son to drive us (with my other half) to XMUM since my eyesight (and driving) is not so good. Reaching there, met Dr. Siti Khatijah and Dr. Zaidan at the office. After finishing some exam matters, we decide to have early dinner together (with my family) at The Grind in front of XMUM.

Still on the exams, just this morning we had the department's exam board meeting and I learned how things are done in XMUM. We still have another thing to do, which is the teaching portfolio that everyone has to do before the semester ends. Job not finished yet.

The meeting before the trip to XMUM was basically for a proposal paper 'subcommittee' for the event that we are planning ahead of the International Year of Quantum Science & Technology in 2025. I gave my views on the matter (particularly the socio-political background) and the need for an organization or institution to take ownership of the event (and not simply by group of individuals as was initially done). I'm not quite sure how my views are perceived by others but I have no hidden agenda behind the views and they are meant to help rather than hinder. We do have the proposed consortium/coalition MyQI, though as far as I know, this has yet to be endorsed by respective partner universities (and hence it is not really official). It is best taken up by MyQI perhaps in collaboration with some recognised body while waiting for its own official recognition. There will probably be voices of concern whether we are ready for this or not, but those in the area should champion the idea (of the event or the organization); I do not expect anyone else (from say materials science or photonics or philosophy of science) to champion it; we have to do this ourselves and one must show our own belief in its importance. MyQI was a good start but in a way we are rather late in comparison with our neighbours. Some weeks ago, a colleague send this picture below showing Malaysia's absence in the quantum scene.

Listed in the pic are Thailand and Philippines on their investment in quantum science & technology. Singapore is already at the forefront together with western countries. Even Indonesia has started off with their BRIN Research Center for Quantum Physics (see also this interview). You might find this odd that Malaysia is not already in the scene. My Singapore colleague actually told me that it is known to them that there were individual efforts scattered around the country making good progress in quantum S&T but these have not being brought into a national concerted effort. There were actually earlier efforts to apply for a big grant together with my colleague in IIUM and other friends but the application was not successful. In a defence of the proposal, an official even told straight to my face, the project was too ambitious and will not work. It is always the case that our decision-makers tend to have poor views on our capabilities and that outsiders appreciate better on what we have been trying to do. Another attempt was during my days with INSPEM, hoping to collaborate with a national body but then Covid came and poof goes the idea. Let us just hope that MyQI will have better success in putting up a national cooperation in this important area. Of course, I now consider myself now as an outsider (riding off into the sunset) but I will give my full support to such cooperation.

On personal side, my family has been busy with matters of the husband of my sister-in-law who is now warded in IJN. My other half and eldest son have already visited him there. I was not able to go because of the commitment with exam matters and meetings. They have run tests on him (again) and found that there are two blockages and the problematic valve which requires surgery. When this will be, has yet to be known.

May Allah grant him recovery and good health.

Varia: Undo Stereotyping

This is my second (physical) attempt of writing this post - mentally, been running several versions in my head, mainly about personal stories of battling stereotypes. Finally, I would keep the post simple and my preference has always been to look into the future rather than caught in the past.

Earlier this week, my sister-in-law and her husband dropped by at our house, on their way to Kuala Lumpur for an appointment with IJN (National Heart Institute). The husband earlier had complications due to heart infection but was later diagnosed with heart problems with one of the valves no longer functioning. He is due to be warded this weekend and may undergo some procedures on the following Monday. Here are some pictures.

That night itself, I was informed about an online meeting on a planned activity on quantum science & technology, which eventually prepares us for the International Year of Quantum Science & Technology in 2025. I did highlight the event in my FB post dated April 15, 2023. Not much excitement when I first posted this, perhaps it was a distant away. Later, I was told by my ex-student, that someone is planning for an event. So, the meeting was a follow-up to the idea. The proposal seems to be conjured at a group level but yet involving the general public. Some of us thought that it would have been better to get an established organization to (co-) organize the event so that it has a better public appeal. This probably have made the planned idea a bit bigger and the suggestion was made not to sideline the original proposer. It is usually harder to get an established organization to agree to help organize the event without having them involved at the very beginning. I had some experience of that with EQuaLS in the past and I was a bit naive then. We were soliciting support from an organization (in fact, two organizations, one of governmental organization and another from a national industry) for a more steady funding for EQuaLS. Below are letters of support from the late Prof. S. Twareque Ali and the late Prof. Paul Busch; we had five other support letters from well-known internationally reputed scientists in the area. Unfortunately, we were unsuccessful, perhaps due to the nature of the event is very much an academic one and it might have seemed that the request is coming from only a single institution.

Despite so, the present proposal of planned activity has (the potential of) greater public exposure that might be of interest to the established organization. Worse come to worst, we can always fall back to the group-level activity that would have less public appeal. In any case, I wish the organizer the best - I will provide whatever support I can.

On Wednesday this week, I had another final exam for the other subject I'm teaching (i.e. Electrodynamics 1) and the venue is at a bigger exam hall. So I was up early to make sure that I was 40 minutes earlier before the exam, as suggested by the admin. Well, I arrived rather too early before anyone was there.

To be frank, this subject was one that I was least comfortable with teaching the subject. It would have better for someone who has more engineering outlook to teach the subject. In any case, I learned quite a bit especially in understanding some aspects of materials interacting with electromagnetic waves. The subject itself is pretty much classical with lots of uses of vector calculus. While I understand that the students had much exposure to vectors before, I thought it would be useful for them to know index notation to help prove many general vector identities. I guess some did not like it and considered this elementary (why learn another tool when you have the ordinary tools that one had before). I did explain to one student that index notation is very much used in theoretical physics, particularly if one goes into more advance stuff say those found in relativity and particle physics. Perhaps thinking that what I have taught being too simple for the students, I went for more advanced stuff in the other subject I'm teaching (Mathematical Methods in Physics 1). This course begins with complex analysis and then the latter topics were special functions, integral transforms and partial differential equations, which are not quite covered by the text book I have adopted (from a list of suggested books). I thought I should find a book that continues with the complex analysis theme through the above mentioned topics mentioned. Two books that I find that do this are Harold Cohen's "Mathematics for Scientists & Engineers" and James P. Keener's "Principles of Applied Mathematics". Since the former is out of print and would be difficult for the students to find, I adopted the latter. Unfortunately, the book is targeted at graduate students and I had to unpack some of the topics in a way accessible to the undergraduates. Not sure if they find this useful but I did put in a lot of efforts to cover some of the useful topics. Part of this experimentation is to show that I had the mantle to cover such advanced topics (not to be stereotyped as one that can't teach advanced subjects). So, I don't know ....

Today, I went to fetch my youngest from Jasin. His class finishes at noon and thereafter we rushed back to Seremban to catch our Friday prayers. Fortunately Masjid Hussain began the Friday sermon slightly later and we were in time. We had a light lunch after Fridays at Belqis Restaurant.

Rajab 1445 Varia

We have entered Rajab 1445, reminding myself closer to the grave (time is running out). I would be 63 soon according to the Hijri calendar. The crisis in Middle East is still raging on after 100 days and still counting (dependent on how one counts). Earlier, I have told my own family to be aware of all major events happening in the world and not to be gullible with soothsayers, end-days-warmongers but yet be mindful, expecting to be surprised at any time. I still share posts about the crisis on social media particularly on humanitarian issues, feeling that is the least I could do.

I still have mixed feelings about social media. Many times I tried to stay away from it but deep down, I thought that I may miss out something. Just yesterday, I saw this paper on Isaac Newton and learned that Newton had an opinion of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) is a prophet of God (see end of pg. 388), in a correspondence to Roger Cotes. Does it add anything to my faith? No, but I understand better who Newton is. 

When people post some opinion pieces on social media, sometimes I have the urge to post my take on it and many times I successfully resisted it (I really hated be in debate where disagreeing followers who are ready to pounce on us. There are times where I failed, of course. I see social media as a double-edged sword; while everyone can express their opinions (almost), due to selective algorithms, users tend to be in their own bubbles where stereotypes get more ingrained, especially those referring to Malaysia. As I have said many times, a major part of my life has been fighting stereotypes and hence the earlier mentioned urge - mainly to balance out the views. 

As a person with some experience (not much of course) in management and administrative matters, issues that have often been raised are discussed in meetings (sometimes fiercely). So, the picture of decision-makers are like zombies, following multiple bosses, are misleading; opinions are raised within closed circles, competing against a variety of (opposite) views. In the end, there will be only one decision and if one is lucky, it will side with the one that one favours. Otherwise consider oneself unlucky. I remembered an incident that I have to message a top management member to be fair in taking (balanced) views. For this, I was then invited to attend the senate meetings thereafter and note that the senate members are full professors of which I am not.

So in one post in social media, I decided to give my opinion on the issue just to say that the issue raised is not particularly unique to Malaysian academia but exists elsewhere as well. I do however express there are particular more basic issues that may have been unique to Malaysia given its historical development but also stated that I tend to be more forgiving these days. It was later that night (after commenting) that I had a nightmare, the type that I always had when I was in management - being ridiculed or sidelined or ignored. That comment I've made, triggered something in my subconscious. I fully understand that I felt I was not doing enough during my management days and perhaps underwent some form of imposter syndrome then. Thereafter, I posted something on the rarity of imposter syndrome in faith-based matters (unlike in science) and I don't just mean religion but even in our social outlook where faith or values play a role in the way we reason. The post is also meant that the degree of intellectual humility that we often impose in science becomes less when it comes to faith-based matters. In any case, back to my management days; I had one colleague down south making the remark that my circle or network of friends are not far enough or influential. This is indeed true since I am more of an introvert; I don't mingle too much after meetings to create a better circle of influence - it is just not me. So when I was interviewed for the XMUM (part-time) job, they asked me whether I want to do management and my reply was that I prefer to focus on science (where things are little clearer).

As far as my current job, it should end by January 31. I have no idea whether I will continue teaching in XMUM. Last week, I had one final exam done for one subject (Math Methods in Physics 1) and have just submitted the marks this morning.

Next week, I will have another one final exam on Electrodynamics 1 (which will be held in a bigger hall and I need to go very early for this). Here are the pics after my final lecture on Electrodynamics.

I hope all of my students will do well in their exams.

Back to College on New Year's Day

Welcome 2024. Found out from Ed Pegg Jr. of Wolfram Research that is a tetrahedral number (never knew about it before) and it is the 22nd (nonzero) number. I posted it up on FB, once I learned about it from this post in Wolfram Community. It is simply just a fun fact (no numerology meanings). I thought it is good to highlight that there are just so many interesting things about numbers (see for instance, https://oeis.org/) and many more, if one just have the knack for it.

One of the things that we did in this 'new year' was getting a group photo before my youngest son go back to college. All of my sons came back sometime in the weekend and I considered this a rarity. We try to make it joyous wherever possible (this requires efforts this day with me not being super healthy). So here are the photos.

Right after the photo shoot, we headed off to Melaka and stopped over in city of Melaka to have lunch and some shopping.

I posted this pic up in FB too despite the thought it may be considered insensitive when somewhere people are being terrorized. The reason being just letting others know that we had something to do that day (sending Izzuddin off to college). There was supposed to be a meeting on that day on organizing some quantum event for Southeast Asia and some asked me to attend it (with Thailand and Singaporean counterparts). In any case, I know little about the matter and it is better to have some younger people to take charge and let them shine. Also, I was getting comfortable of being less involved in things (as someone cheekily said that it is time for 'us, seniors' to be forgotten and joined the RTM group - relax tunggu mati). On a serious note, I prefer to spend more time with the family, doing scientific things in my spare time and try to focus more for the next phase of life.

After that time in the mall, we all went down to Jasin to send off Izzuddin.

As we went home, there was this huge jam on the highway.

We got home at around 5.30pm in the evening.